You order takeout and find items wrong or missing entirely. What’s your inner narrative? *

How hard is it to get an order right? You had one job

Do they even care about who they’re serving? How are they still in business?

Ugh, how lame. I won’t bother anyone about it, though

If they’re this careless about fulfilling orders, how clean can their kitchen be? Yuck

When someone gives you “constructive criticism”, what happens first? *

You feel the need to defend yourself or over explain.

You feel disrespected. Who are they to call you out?

Immediately shut down and mentally note what happened.

You go along with it even if you disagree, worried about rocking the boat.

When in an argument, you usually… *

Try to hear them out/play mediator

Get loud, making sure you feel like you held your ground

Withdraw until you can process what’s happening

Call out double standards or hypocrisy immediately

Which is your strongest gut punch? *

Someone gives you the silent treatment or shuts you out

You’re blamed for something that wasn’t your fault

You open up and it’s used against you later

Someone critiques your effort after you tried your best

What’s most likely to spark you while driving? *

People generally not abiding the rules of the road (slow in the fast lane, distracted, driving on the shoulder of the road to pass)

Getting blamed when it wasn’t your fault (not checking their blind spot before changing lanes then honking/gesturing/yelling at you when you nearly crash, honking when you’re waiting for a pedestrian to cross that they don’t see)

Reckless drivers (weaving between lanes, speeding in residential areas, talking/texting/eating while driving)

Inconsiderate drivers (they won’t let you in while merging, taking the spot you’ve been waiting for, not saying thank you after being let in)

When someone crosses a boundary, your first instinct is: *

Tighten control for next time - that won’t be happening again

Call it out right away - they won’t get away with that

Explain why it’s not ok and expect accountability

Minimize how upset you are to avoid conflict

When someone close to you betrays your trust, you: *

Cut them off cold - once crossed, you don’t come back

Make sure they understand exactly what they did wrong

Lose respect and close off - trust isn’t rebuilt easily

Feel chaotic inside & obsess over their reasons

You feel most misunderstood when people say: *

“You’re too sensitive” / “you’re overreacting”

“Why are you like this?” / “what’s wrong with you?”

“You need to let things go” / “It’s not a big deal”

“Oh so you’re perfect?” / “It’s your way or no way”

Your anger most often comes from: *

People talking over or dismissing you

No one taking responsibility

Feel excluded or unseen

Being blamed or criticized

When you imagine being more regulated / steady, you’re chasing: *

Empowerment: I can feel confident setting boundaries

Belonging: I can stop proving my worth to others

Safety: No more walking on eggshells

Wholeness: I can be myself / like myself

First Name *

Last Name *

Email *

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